Most people may not remember April 19th, 2009...
For some, it was the day we had learned of Paul Newman's troubled past with women and alcohol; For others, it was when archeologists dug up the remains of Egypt's lost queen, Cleopatra. However, for few April 19th, 2009 was the day I had made my long awaited introduction to the world of social media, “Yo.”
Seven years, one month, and eight days ago my brother had posted a 150-word story on my Facebook wall about running into Zdeno Chara at a bank in Boston. Evidently I was unimpressed because my only response was "wtf you should have gotten a picture with him u p*ssy."
Six years, ten months and two days ago I had informed the world I was "Going to josh's party later."
One hour later, "I'm over Joshes."
On July 4th 2009, I was "Bored as a motha f*cker."
The week following ensued a flood of personality quizzes and high-scores on "Downhill Snowboard."
And it kind of just repeats itself like that for quite a long time.
The fortunate part of rediscovering the embarrassingly poor impulse control of a 13 year-old self is that you were a teen and not a 2016 presidential nominee.